If I were to describe myself, one of the last words I would use, is the word patient. I am a “lets get it done” girl. I have lists and I like to cross things off of them. If I get an idea in my head, much to the chagrin of Hubby, it has to get done and done now.
This adoption process has been an education in patience for me. In the beginning, I would get myself all worked up about the wait. It was to the point of making my life and those in my life miserable. I would get so down about something that I had no power over.
It then hit me that this is something that I could not control and I needed to except that fact and move on. I am not an overall religious girl, but for some reason, I felt that this wait was meant to teach me something. That it was for the best of the family. That there was something positive to get out of this experience.
In the beginning, I needed to spend so much time with Mr. D and his issues. He had to go to speech, occupational, and physical therapy every week. There were appointments with the neurologist, pediatrician, and social worker. We were so busy trying to do the best for him, a little baby would have been lost in the shuffle. I realized the wait was what our family needed and what I could deal with.
I now have a child who is ten, one who is five, and lastly a six month old. I feel like I was given what I could handle at the time. Five year gaps between babies is giving me a breather before starting over again. It like having three “only” children. I am really good at one baby at a time!
Patience…it is once again being tested. I, once again, am trying to understand what lesson is being taught to me.
On Friday we received a call from Homeland Security denying our immigration forms for our Little Dragon. When I asked the reason, I was in shock…
Her birthday is March 18th. We received our referral on September 19th. She was six months and one day. We were so excited to have a child so young!
BUT they found her papers in China were matched to us on September 14th. That made her four days shy of six months.
Who cares you think…well, I guess the government does. We are only allowed to adopt a child six months to five years. Dragon was just four days shy, when matched to us.
Due to these four days, we were denied.
What does this mean…. We need to rework our home study to allow us to adopt a child five months and older. We have to fill out supplemental forms to add to our 1-800. We need to get an approval from our adoption agency about “all” this stuff….and let’s not forget write several hefty checks for the “processing” fees.
My patience is being tested again…
She will be seven months old next week. Our wait to see her was lengthen due to this new paperwork. I am trying to understand and accept, but I look at her little face and worry for her. I pray that there are kind hands holding her. I pray that there are gentle words being said to her. I pray she is fed well and stays in good health.
My heart is heavy, but I will be patient.