My ears are bleeding!

How can such a little person have such a loud and piercing scream?

For how sweet and good nature she is during the day, she is the opposite at night. Our nights are getting out of hand. I am surviving on little sleep and when mommy doesn’t sleep….that is no good for the whole family. Ms.A and Mr.D have really good sleep habits and have great night time routines. Why am I having such a problem with our littlest one?

I can tell you that each night it is getting worse and worse. I am trying to be very consistent, keep a food journal, watch her day time napping, keeping things calm and low key before bedtime…..

She is a champ at her daytime naps. No big fusses, just puts her little head down and off to sleep. You would think that at night it would be the same. I do everything the same. The room is set up the same. The lighting, the sound, the temp….everything! Yet, she screams as soon as she goes down. Not a cry…a SCREAMING…YELLING…THRASHING FIT. There is absolutely no soothing her. If you pick her up she goes rigid and intensifies. If you try to rub or pat her to calm her down, the same reaction.

It is breaking my heart to see her in these fits and nothing that I do seems to help. Last night Hubby actually pulled me out of the nursery and closed the door. We just waited it out. Several hours later of on and off crying, she went quiet out of pure exhaustion.

This can’t be the solution.

I refuse to have this be the solution.

There has to be something I can do.

Thursday we go to the pediatrician for her one month check up. This will be a huge discussion point. I am not a novice mom, but I feel like one.

Any ideas or suggestions would be gladly accepted.

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13 Comments

Filed under adoption, Family

13 responses to “My ears are bleeding!

  1. It’s hard to say what will work. I’ve been told and read that letting your child cry her self to sleep is the right thing to do. My son has cried as long as an hour before going to sleep.
    We learned to put and keep Jaydon or son on a schedule. Bed time is 8pm so starting at 7pm we would bathe, diaper, dress, brush teeth, and prepare him for bed. We also turn down the lights in his room shortly before putting him down.
    Try to use this hour before bed time to eliminate all distractions. TV, radio, bright lights, other people. Only Mommy, daddy and baby and a quite house or room.
    I hope this helps.

    ————————————————
    Chris Hall
    The Adventures of Jaydon And Daddy
    http://JaydonAndDaddy.com

  2. kdevanne@aol.com

    Does she have a crutch of some sort? For Brigid it was a bottle at bed time (she didn’t care much for any particular doll, binkie, blanket etc) anyway without her little bottle we would have gone mad. Oh, and we used music and some funky nightlights. Stars on the ceiling, fake fish tank, etc

    Good luck

    Trina

  3. Although AJ was older when she came to us, night routine in her foster home could go on for hours.
    So we would sit with her on our lap, read a couple of stories and then have absolute quiet. Jay and I would pretend to sleep until she dropped off.
    Maybe you and your husband could try it on alternate nights so she does not become reliant on just one of you at bed time and it will also give your other children Mummy and Daddy time.
    As I said AJ was older, but it might be worth a try.

  4. I’m not even sure what to say. Sydney cried b/c she wanted us to pick her up. Once we did, she stopped. But I had too wait until she was in a dead sleep to put her back in the crib, or she’d wake up and we’d start all over again. I was falling asleep on the couch during the day when she was playing in the family room b/c I was so exhausted.

  5. Kim o

    Even though she is not attached to a lovie, try her on one. We didn’t think my daughter did but once I started giving her a cloth diaper, that was her lovie. Put it in her hand and rub her cheek with it. Our daughter slept with hers until she was almost five. I started cutting it smaller to wean her off. I used multiple ones, as long as they were the flat cloth diapers. That way if we lost one, we just used another. She needs something to self soothe. And I agree with routine. Rub lavender lotion on her as you sing the same song each night while you give her the lovie. Routine is key. We also turned on the Ocean Wonder. She knew that meant sleep.

  6. Ellen

    Hi!! I read your post with great sympathy, we had bedtime issues for YEARS with our now 9-year old daughter. If you would like to chat I have had a lot of experience on this front (unfortunately). Email me privately and I will send a phone number if that would be helpful.
    Ellen from Connecticut echviola@yahoo.com
    (I have a 9-yr. old from Hunan province and a 3-yr. old from Jiangxi province)

  7. Leigh

    Hello, I just stubbled upon your blog and I can totally understand your situation because our first daughter did the same thing. I actually got sick with sleep deprivation. She would actually go to bed quite well but would always wake somewhere between 10pm – 12.30pm and their was no getting her back to sleep in her room, believe me I tried everything for month, read books, ask professionals. I just did not feel that all the remedies folks used on birth children fitted out situation with an orphanage baby who had already spent 14 months crying for attention. Her doctor once said to me “whatever it takes for all of you to get a good nights sleep then do what feels right” SO I did the unthinkable ” my bed ” and she would sleep all night clutching my night gown or whatever I was wearing. When she reached around 4 yrs old I told her that if she woke up at night and could not go back to sleep in her bed she could come into our room but she had to sleep in the bed on the floor beside momma…( I made her a blanket bed with pillow – nothing fancy at all ) at first she did not like that either but as time went on it worked out well for all. Although I always heard her come in she never spoke or woke us she would just lay down on the floor and fall asleep instantly. This went on until she was about 9yrs old.. Yup 9… She is now 16 yrs old and she still has issues falling asleep and most nights takes a melotonin ( these help her alot )
    Good luck, cuddle lots, do whatever it takes to get sleep and worry about it later, she will grow out of it eventually.
    On another note we had the complete opposite experience with our 2nd daughter, she loved her own bed! yeah… she is now 12 yrs.

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